I talked to a father of a 13 year old son that he lost to suicide. I was able to be the voice for his son. I do NOT claim to be an expert on this subject, I am just speaking of what I see, hear and experience when I talk to these families. I am not here to judge nor never would I. I am only here in hopes to help.
First.... when did life become so busy that we do not take time to talk anymore? Even if it is something small? Those small things in someone else's mind could be major things or may be building up into something that a person can not handle anymore. Families use to sit together at the dinner table giving us time to notice if there may be something out of the ordinary with someone. WE have allowed our lived to become so fast paced that life and time is but a blink of an eye.
When someone commits suicide, those of us who are left behind right away think the person who did it was selfish and uncaring or they would not have done it. Please understand that the person who committed suicide was not in their right mind at the time and was not thinking these rational thoughts. There are many stages of grief.
Anger that they did it.
Guilt because we feel we need to find the answer why
Grief because we want them back so bad but we know that will not happen.
Sorrow for what they will miss out on and what we will miss out on as well. There are so many more emotions I am sure.
I am noticing that with some kids, they take their suicide to a point of wanting and needing attention and they think what ever modality they have chosen that if they go a little father that they will get more attention and then things go terribly wrong. The kids are not really thinking that this is permanent either. Its almost as if the think that they will have this short few moments to decide to come back. This is what has been scaring me. They have no idea what suicide really is and what it means.
We are afraid to talk to our kids about suicide and I have no idea why. We are afraid to bring things up for fear it may make them think about it if they already haven't. I do not have statistics but I am sure that most kids have had this thought at least 1 time in their life. WE need to address it NOW BEFORE it is too late. We can not bring them back afterwards. Is this an epidemic you really want to play Russian roulette with?
Do not let your kids say " yeah yeah I know and would never do that". Sit them down and make them understand and hear everything there is to know about it. There is not a choice to come back if they do not like it.